


Your Name Has Echoed Through My Mind

by cozypancakes



Series: I'm the Mess that You Wanted [2]
Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 11:45:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16932687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cozypancakes/pseuds/cozypancakes
Summary: He Tian has been on Mo's mind for days now. And not just He Tian, but his touches and heated looks and all the ways Mo feels about him. Would it be so horrible if Mo returned He Tian's feelings? Even if it was just a little bit.





	Your Name Has Echoed Through My Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Can be read as a sequel to "Safe and Warm", but works perfectly fine as a stand alone!

There'd been too many touches lately. An arm over his shoulder was one thing. But the hand holding in his bedroom and the hand on his neck...He Tian's lips right next to his ear, so fucking close. 

Mo shook his head. He could feel the heat creeping up on his cheeks. He shouldn't be thinking about any of this. Mo stared at the pot in front of him. All he should be thinking about was stirring the stew. Nothing more. 

He kept a steady rhythm for all of thirty seconds before his mind started to wander again. It was more than the casual touches He Tian insisted on. It was the staring. He Tian had barely been back two days and Mo was cracking under his constant gaze. What could He Tian find so interesting about him? Sure, his red hair made him stand out, but otherwise there was nothing special about him. Yet He Tian was annoyingly focused on him. And then today in the bathroom...

A furious blush overtook Mo's cheeks. Fucking He Tian! He couldn't do the polite thing and wait for him outside the bathroom. He couldn't even be annoying like Jian Yi and simply be there. No, He Tian had to be unique. And a pervert. He had to fucking stare at his dick while Mo took a piss. God, what if He Tian had some weird kink about that? 

"Shit." Mo's face was on fire now. He wasn't supposed to be thinking about any of this. Let along about what He Tian may or may not like in bed. Mo should just go back to thinking about all the annoying  times He Tian touched him. Like today in the gym...

No, no, no!

"Fucking shit!" Mo groaned. How many days had he spent agonizing over He Tian?

"What's wrong, Little Mo?" 

"Fucking hell!" Mo jumped. Why did He Tian have to show up all of a sudden? Fuck the fact that this was his apartment. 

He Tian seemed to be fighting back a smile. "Do I make you that nervous, Little Mo?"

"Yes," Mo groaned. Fuck, no. Not that.

"I do?" There was a warmth to He Tian all of a sudden that was ten times worse than the sarcastic, teasing aura he always had. 

"I didn't mean it like that," Mo replied. He turned back to the stove and turned off the flame. Fuck, his face was so red. He couldn't let He Tian see him like this. "I need to take a piss." 

Without further ado, Mo fled the kitchen. Fuck He Tian and his fucking puppy dog eyes. 

He slammed the bathroom door a little harder than he meant to. What was he doing? When did everything change for them? 

_ "I'll clear a path for you, you go first."  _

Mo slid down the door to the floor. Yeah, things had changed then. Fuck He Tian. Mo ran his hands angrily through his hair. Before then, Mo had been doing good. He was lying to himself so well. He didn't find He Tian attractive. He didn't care that He Tian was all alone in this city. He didn't notice the way He Tian would look at him. He didn't believe He Tian thought anymore of him than someone he could tease and kill his boredom with. 

But now...

Now all Mo could think about was He Tian's arms wrapped around his thighs, lifting him up in the middle of the gym. All he could think about was how good He Tian looked standing in his bedroom with only his boxers on. 

"Fuck," Mo mumbled into his hands. He was so utterly screwed. 

He let himself sit on the cold tile a little longer before picking himself up. Mo washed his hands more out of habit than necessity. When he got back to the kitchen, he was surprised to see He Tian sitting at the table, scrolling through his phone, two bowls already set in front of him. He Tian looked up from his phone long enough to give him a smile. He then proceeded to start eating his dinner, ignoring the fact that Mo was still standing there like an idiot. 

_ Fuck... _

Mo finally made himself sit down at the table and eat. There was barely any conversation, both enjoying the meal. Yet the only thing on Mo's mind while he ate and then cleaned up the kitchen was to wonder if it was really such a horrible thing to have feelings for He Tian. 

When he finished in the kitchen, Mo didn't think he had an answer to his question. But he knew he didn't want to leave. It was still pretty early in the evening. He Tian usually bugged him to stay and play or watch something on TV. Would Mo be giving the wrong signal if he stayed without any need of being persuaded? It would be safer to leave now. 

_ What are you running from?  _

The harsh kiss He Tian forced on him came to the front of his mind. The blind panic and embarrassment had been so fucking strong then. He'd been a little afraid of He Tian after that. Was he still afraid? Not really, no. This was the He Tian that comforted him when he was puking his guts out in the middle of the street. The one that was ready to take on twenty men by himself so Mo could be safe. The one who looked pissed as hell when someone threw a soda can at him. 

He couldn't really ignore the warm feeling in his chest thinking about He Tian now. Mo trusted He Tian. 

Yet it was still a slippery slope...Staying here, tonight, could lead to something he couldn’t take back later.

Before he could chicken out, Mo walked over to the couch where He Tian was watching a basketball game. He sat down a safe distance away from He Tian, yet not on the other end of the coach like he tended to do. He was grateful that He Tian didn't say anything. Little by little, Mo began to relax and actually pay attention to the game. 

He'd all but forgotten why he'd been so nervous when he felt a hand on his. His whole body tensed before he could stop himself. He Tian's fingers were gone just as quickly as they had appeared. Mo didn't want to turn to see He Tian's face. What would he see? Hurt? Embarrassment? Resignation?

Fuck everything to hell!

Not daring to take his eyes off the TV, Mo reached out his hand in the general direction he assumed He Tian’s hand would be. What his hand landed on was a bit more wide and more solid than a hand. Mo's face turned three shades of red in a matter of seconds. He could feel He Tian tense below his hand as well. Mo mentally shook himself. He couldn't turn back now. Might as well commit to this. 

Mo settled back into the couch, loosening the grip he had on He Tian's thigh. Thank God his hand hadn't landed inappropriately high up on his thigh. Yet Mo was beginning to worry a few seconds later. He Tian wasn't moving, he might not even be breathing. Was he upset? Maybe Mo should run out of the apartment like he'd first wanted to. As if he could read Mo's mind, He Tian placed his hand on top of Mo's. 

It was many minutes of awkward silence before the two teenagers seemed to accept the new position. Neither of them was about to be the first to pull away, afterall. 

It was just hand holding, really. That's what Mo kept repeating to himself. He didn't have to confess to the guy or do anything more than just keep his hand where it was. Baby steps. Or huge big leaps into the abyss. They both felt the same right now.  


End file.
